In the role of carer for someone who had a very serious cancer operation and for whom the prognosis was not good I sought counselling from the Deborah Ubee Trust, with some reluctance, and at the urging of my family, as I did not think I would gain that much from the experience. I suppose I also thought that my sense of impending loss would be a relatively straightforward thing for me to deal with through my own reflection on the situation. I felt that I could manage perfectly well without outside help. Counselling, however, enabled me to see that this was not so.
In the first place I found a sympathetic and friendly environment to take my worries to. And I felt comfortable with voicing my concerns and fears to a counsellor who seemed to understand me perfectly and who was able to help me to explore all the concerns that I had. This was a long and sometime painful exploration of my position, yet one in which I felt at times freed from the constraints I had imposed on myself by supposing that I could manage on my own.
Through the process of counselling I was enabled to feel that I had a duty to myself outside the role of carer; that I my own emotional needs had to be met. In effect, that I had to live my own life. And in the process of exploring this aspect of my situation I found that the counselling expanded to encompass other areas of my being that went beyond the context of my role as carer. That I had a life, a past, a history of my own that needed to be taken into account in order to see myself in my present role. This aspect of the counselling process has been a liberating experience for me in that it provided a much wider exploration of my personal circumstances than I had expected. For this I am extremely grateful to the Deborah Ubee Trust.
My experience with The Deborah Ubee Trust has been excellent from the receptionists to the counsellors I have felt such warmth and care. the service has been one of tremendous learning when I needed a lot of questions answered.
My counsellor was a very caring person who was so experienced .... when I was unable to fully understand the challenges that I was dealing with daily. I felt my experience with the Deborah Ubee Trust enabled me to realise something that was always difficult for me ie.about the choices we make and how we deal with them.
The Deborah Ubee Trust provided emotional support and professional tailored care to me and my daughter based on our need and regardless of our ability to pay. Our care was comprehensive and ultimately lasted for a year. This no doubt represents a large resource for the Trust but at no time was our care ever jeopardised by financial concerns.
The Deborah Ubee Trust is a vital community resource, which provides hope and support to those in need and abandoned by the system
I am thoroughly grateful to the Trust and those inspired to create, and committed to provide this service. It is life-changing.
Please roll out the Deborah Ubee Trust nationwide. It is required to plug the void in mental health services.
Thank you for the trust and the therapist who helped me enormously. I cannot say thank you enough. I have just completed around 9 months of weekly sessions with (my therapist) Deborah Ubee Trust, after they helped my teenage daughter resolve some issues at the start of last year. My therapist’s calm, patient approach was hugely helpful in what was a difficult year for me and I found I got much more out of the sessions than I had ever expected. Although a small organisation, I always felt they had my best interests at heart and I was under no pressure to finish the sessions before I was ready. All the staff I dealt with including Reception staff were friendly, helpful and very professional at all times. I hope this wonderful Trust goes from strength to strength as they provide such a valuable service.
Abuse I had went on for a long time since I was very young. In results, I grow up with having no self-esteem and no resilience. I struggled with dealing with people all my life. It eventually led to depression.
Art therapy helped me to release my emotions, such as anger and fear, within a safe environment. It was a big relief to realise that I can express those feelings without breaking the world or harming other people including myself. The therapist was completely non-judgemental and supportive consistently throughout the sessions, and it gave me confidence to explore my dark and sometimes explosive feelings.
Expressing my feelings physically, such as movements, drawing pictures made it possible to release those angers and fears I bottled up in my body and mind for a long period of time. It sounds strange, but making a story and drawing opened up my emotions without talking about my problems directly.
I was gripped with intense hatred as it was senseless that I went through those abuses for long, and no one seemed to be held accountable for. At the same time I understand it was vicious circle of abuse kept going within both of my parents’ families. Abusers are also victims in the past, and it just kept going like no one can stop the wheel once it starts running in one direction. I knew those angers and hatred were holding myself back, however I couldn’t seem to let it go. I didn’t know where I could direct this anger and hatred, and it became another identity of myself, so it was a big fear to loose it, too. I wanted to let it go, but I feared I loose myself by letting it go as well.
By doing movement or making a story and drawing, those anger and hatred left me without my realising. I cannot express in word how light I feel and how much relief it gave me. I now feel I live now and here, and enjoy my existence and other people’s company. I still feel myself and my life worthless time to time, however, it doesn’t stay long, and I am confident to deal with those emotions, as it is a part of life, not whole of my life.
The therapy I receieved at The Deborah Ubee Trust has helped me enormously. The main difference in my outlook now compared with before therapy lies in the recognition and appreciation of my worth and equality vis-a-vis others in my life since birth.
For years I have 'people-pleased' and deferred to the wishes or needs of others thinking in so doing I would secure their love or affection. Such behaviour back-fired and built up inner anger which gave false impressions all round. Fear of confrontation and being left alone fuelled my behaviours.
A year of therapy has made me far stronger, less dependant on the whims of others and a happier, less confused person. My therapy was subtle, affirming and touched nerves that CBT and courses of antidepressants over the past 40 years have never reached.I now face the vicissitudes and vagaries of life hopeful and stronger ....